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"The Young Cons" Are Coming. And Their Rapping Sucks.

Unbelievable.

: (

[Thanks MoonDog]

Ken Block Is An ACE Rally Driver. And Makes Cool Shoes.

Ken Block co-founded DC Shoes. Somehow, he's also one of the world's top rally drivers.

Watch the video. It's SICK. As ol' Kenny boy would say.

Ricky Gervais Paps The Paps On-Set Of New Cemetery Junction Film.

Trademark, smug-arse grin? Check. Pap trying to snap him? Check. New-found hobby of papping back at the paps? DEFFO.

From his blog:

So, one week done of principal photography on the feature film Cemetery Junction. Six to go.

For that entire period we have hired a unit photographer who is one set all day. I discovered a new fun game to play. I make him take pictures of the paparazzi. We also have an EPK crew. (Electronic Press Kit) They record interviews with the cast and get B-roll on DV cameras.) I will start interviewing the paps too maybe. Possibly follow them home.

Here is the first in my series of pictures of people who hide behind walls for a living.

LEAKED: Michael Bay Emails Paramount A Bollocking. Then Sort Of Apologises.

Michael Bay is DA MAN. And Transformers 2 is awesome. Well, apart from the bit where Shia ends up in a low-budget robo-heaven chatting to some dead metal.

But anyway, turns out that on May 4 at 19:07 exactly, Bay wasn't happy with Paramount's efforts in promoting the film, telling them they were "lame" and that the print campaign was an "abject failure".

But all was well again on June 6, when he emailed again, to pat them on the back and congratulate them on bringing their "A game".

Read the first email (pdf): Download Michael Bay is angry.

Now read the second one (also a pdf) when he realises they've made him another few hundred million bucks: Download Michael Bay is not angry anymore.

[TMZ]

First Look: Johnny Depp Is The Mad Hatter For Alice In Wonderland.

 
And he's done an ace job of making himself look like Elijah Wood.

More trippy pics and deets on the new Tim Burton epic over at USA Today.

2012: The World's Most FX Mental Movie Trailer.

From the man who gave us Independence Day, The Day After Tomorrow and 10,000 BC, some more feature length doomsday destruction.

More on 2012 here.

Montague Paratrooper Tactical Folding Mountain Bike.

QUITE a mouthful. But what else do you expect from a bike that's built for the military? Even if we're almost 99.99 per cent certain the military would have almost no use for a 24-speed mountain bike.

But it does fold. And it's made of aluminium. So maybe you could throw it at an approaching enemy.

Yours for eight hundred bucks (£484) here.

Meet Midge, The World's Smallest Police Dog.

Just 11 inches tall, weighs a touch under four kilos. RAD.

Midge is a Chihuahua, if you hadn't noticed, and recently clocked up her first solo drug conviction after discovering drugs hidden in a burglar's vehicle. (There's no way you could have noticed that - don't be too hard on yourselves).

Not sure she should be driving, though. She can't even reach the pedals.

[Reuters]

Olympus PEN E-P1. Want One.

Retro D-SLRs are already big business - if you can afford them. Now the E-P1 makes them a bit cheaper, but no less cool.

"The 12.3-megapixel interchangeable lens camera features in-body image stabilization, a 3-inch HyperCrystal LCD with Live View function, a dust reduction system, and compatibility with a selection of interchangeable lenses."

And it does HD video recording.

In the US? Get one here. The UK? It's here.

Superbad 2 Is Go, Says Michael Cera. And It Contains Midgets.

Suh-WEET. Michael Cera has posted this epic announcement on his blog:

Hey. So, I’m sure many of you have been wondering what’s the deal with Superbad 2. Is it happening or what? Am I right? Well, the thing with it is that most of the people from Superbad are far to busy with other things in their careers to sign up for it right now. We may still have it in the future, but it depends on what happens. For the plot of Superbad 2, we are thinking of having Evan and Seth begin college. We’re planning for Seth to want to get babes so he joins cheerleading (still not sure about that). Evan is trying to keep his relationship with Becca going strong, but meets someone which makes him have to choose between them. Evan also trys-out for a football team, when he gets in, he is surprised, then finds out he is in a team with midgets. For Foggel and the cops, they go in for military training (we’re going to build on to that later). We really hope to go forward with this film. So far we have me and Jonah Hill and Seth Rogan signed on. It may take a while, but keep your hopes up.

-Michael

MEGA.

Check out his blog here.

WATCH THIS!!! The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard. The Red Band Trailer.

Like Anchorman, but in a used car dealership. With Jeremy Piven being Jeremy Piven.

Hit up the official site here. No. We are NOT the official website.

Easy mistake, though.

Twitter Watch: Mariah Carey Is OBSESSED. But Only On Her New Album Cover.

Is Mariah Carey looking ACE again? Is that why this new album art shot up on Twitter?

Or did we only notice because of the rising damp on the wall behind her? Looks serious. Anything that high has to be serious. But then she's only about six inches tall, so maybe it's just above the skirting.

Best call it in anyway. Insurers want to know about this stuff.

More on her Twitter here. But we weren't looking, right? We just, um, found it.

Brüno Does US GQ. Naked.

Hmm. Might be time to cancel the subscription.

Actually, we DO need to get to know our inner bro. And what with Brüno's indispensable sartorial advice (even if SBC has just rehashed the Marie Claire gags), they can keep our cash. For now.

Over to Brüno in US GQ:

Dear Brüno, is it okay to “manscape” down there?
It’s more zan okay; it is most essential. Be careful if you do it yourself, though—yesterday ich tried to self-wax mein arschenhaller und glued meinself to ze bed. Manscaping ist important, but not as crucial as getting regular anal bleaching. If Brüno didn’t get his schmutziger arschenhaller bleached twice a month, his shtinker vould resemble Dizzy Gillespie during a trumpet solo. In Austria anal bleaching ist considered so important zat it’s paid for by ze state. In fact, you cannot run for office if you don’t have a vhite arschwitz. Indeed, ex-chancellor Kurt Waldheim vas elected on ze back of a prishtine anus. Zere are added benefits to getting ze bleaching—on my last session, mein beautician, Klaus, found ze long-lost head of a David Beckham action figure up zere.



[JustJared]

Rio Ferdinand Has Gone Mad. In Israel. In Tiny Shorts.

And a crop top. Did we forget to mention that? We did.

The 30-year-old Manchester United and England international star is kicking back with some pals in Israel. He's also learning to speak Hebrew.

Gimp.

[SplashNews]

The US Army & The World's Largest Herd Of White Deer.

We know. Weird. But bear with us.

"The story begins in 1941 at an army depot in Seneca County, NY when some soldiers noticed a couple white deer roaming inside their 24-square-mile fenced-off base. Realizing that something strange (and wonderful) was afoot, the General ordered the soldiers to protect the white deer. While the soldiers continued to hunt brown deer inside the confines of the reserve, the white ones were allowed to breed. With predators were kept at bay by a giant fence, and pressure put on the brown deer by hunting, the white deer population was able to explode. (These blanched deer are not albinos, as you might assume, but rather possess two copies of another rare recessive gene for whiteness.) There are now 200 of them roaming the grounds, the largest herd of white deer anywhere in the world."

More on the website here.

Osama Bin Laden. Now Selling Stuff.

You want Super Osama Bin Laden Kulfa Balls milk and coconut flavour sweets?

You need to hit the bazaar in Kandahar, Pakistan.

That is all.

[Reuters]

Mummified Monks. Now Featuring Ray-Bans.

This dude is a mummified Buddhist monk, currently stood behind glass at Wat Kunaram on Koh Samui, Thailand. A place where kids go to get TRASHED. Which is probably why this monk, named Phra Khru Samathakittikhun, has got the whole Wayfarer thing going on. KIDS ARE SO COOL.

'SPECT.

[EPA]

JJ Abrams And The Cruisester Say Mission: Impossible 4 Is Go. Maybe.

JJ Abrams. Tom Cruise. MISSION IMPOSSIBLE 4 O'CLOCK!

Well, according to American TV Guide:

"I am incredibly honoured that Tom has invited me back as a producer on 'Mission Impossible 4'," Abrams told them. "Tom and I have come up with a really cool idea we are pursuing."

But that's it. He's not willing to give up the deets on that multi-million dollar franchise-extending, guaranteed blockbuster "idea". Typical.

Ronaldo Scores!!! Um. With Paris Hilton.

How do you party after scoring a world record £80m deal with Real Madrid? By scoring again... with Paris Hilton. And her sister. And $20,000 worth of champagne.

LIVIN' THE DREAM.

[X17Online.com]

Gisele Bundchen Goes Nude For Art Mag. Well, Sort Of Nude.

Because it's a bit like she fell over and some kids ran up and started crayoning all over her. But whatever. She's dropped the clothes for the new issue of PHOTO and gone full-ink. It's like full-retard, but with tatts.

That doesn't make sense.

Click to go big:

 

 

World's Largest Bankruptcies Make Ace Infographic.

In honour of General Motors becoming the fourth largest bankruptcy in history, here's some more businesses-going-under doom and gloom - the biggest sinking ships of business history (note: this has nothing to do with actual ships). Click on the pic to go MASSIVE.

One upside: it looks nice.

[GOOD Magazine]

Husqvarna Panthera Leo Is World's Coolest Lawnmower. Yes, Please.

And it's cool mainly because it's got such a ridiculous name. But also because it looks like that.

It's electric, made from recycled materials, has three individually suspended cutting decks, an LCD display that tells you how fast you're caning it across the lawn, cutting height, cutting width, remaining battery time, service needs and warns you about objects - like kids - that are too close. You navigate around using paddles on the steering wheel. Paddles!

Want one. Want one. Want one. Don't have a lawn. Still want one.

More here.

Phil Spector's New Look. No Wig Necessary.

But that's because he's GOING DOWN.

Busted, Philip. BUSTED.

Let's remember some of his better hair days:

[Splash News]

Posh Goes See-Thru In London. Bit Nippy.

Victoria Beckham strolls out of Claridge's Hotel in London... then suddenly remembers she forgot her bra.

Not complaining.

More pics - click to go BOOM:

[Splash News]

Footballer Has Heartattack On Pitch. Shocks Himself Back To Life.

Unbelievable. Unless it had happened. And was then posted on YouTube.

"Anthony Van Loo (Roeselare Belgian first division) got a heart attack in the 44th minute of the game. He has a heart condition and he got an implanted defibrillator. This automatically gave his heart a shock after 4 seconds (that's the movement you see) and this saved him."

'maaaazin.

[Thanks Rob]

First Look: Mickey Rourke Suits Up For Iron Man 2!!!

In a word: exciting. In five words: where's the rest of it?

The Mickster's playing Whiplash - a bad ass with some gadgets of his own.

"The villain's alter ego, Ivan Vanko, is a Russian who 'has constructed his own version of a suit,' Favreau says. Among the creative innovations: a pair of whips, powered by the suit's glowing chest piece, that are expected to keep Iron Man cracking."

More here. And check out Favreau's Twitter here.

Cristiano Ronaldo Hits LA. In Stretch Hummer.

Suspected hernia injury? Check. Skin tight outfit? Check. OTT stretch hummer delivering him to Madeo restaurant in Beverly Hills? CHECK. But Ronnie's not stopping here. Miami hold on tight: he's expected there next.

More pics - click to go big:

[BauerGriffinOnline/Radcliffe]

Zach Galifianakis On The Tig Series.

Hmm. Comedian Tig Nitaro tries to out-Zach Galifianakis Zach Galifianakis.

Is weird. Best stick with The Hangover.

STOP. Hammer Time Raid!!!

Awesome.

(Although we'd have run out with some clothes, too, in the malaise).

Tactical Grilling Kits Are GO.

"Constructed of 1000D Cordura in Universal Digital Camo, the Tactical Grilling Apron features three rows of modular attachment across the waist and two rows across the chest."

The important bit? The beer holsters.

Want? Get yours here.